Monday, January 01, 2007

Joe Blog's Interview #26 Hot Coffee Girl

Name : Hot Coffee Girl
Age : 34 ¾
Location : Cleveland
Vocation : Web Geek
Philosophy : “If the doctor told me I had six minutes to live, I'd type a little faster.”

Sum up what your blog is about for us.
Everyday life, my own personal quest for truth, the writers I read, that bitch who cut me off in traffic this morning…it’s all there in eye-bursting green.

Why are you doing your blog?
I have been writing as long as I can remember. When I was in elementary school, I used to type out these silly little “articles” and stories on our electric typewriter, and then cut them up and pasted them onto a bigger sheet of paper. I drew pictures to go along with some of the pieces, or beg my mom (who was-and is-much better at drawing) to do it for me. My dad would copy them at work, and I would pass them out to everyone I saw. This is the high-tech version of that.

How much would you sell your blog for?
Those people who say that they wouldn’t sell their blogs for any amount of money…they are fucking nut jobs. No, I am not in this for the money. But damn, there are still other ways to write. It’s not like you’re asking how much money to cut off my arms. (Are you?)
As for how much? Hmm…let’s pop the thing on eBay and see how much it fetches. Technorati says it’s worth about $47K. We’ll have that as the starting bid. I take Pay Pal. Or just buy me a pack of smokes and we’ll call it even.

Tell us a random funny story that comes to mind.
Really, any conversation with my best friend, Ali cracks me up. One recent example:
Me : So, have you, like, been in a good mood in the last month or so?
Her : No. Not at all. I mean, there are moments of happiness. But a general good mood? Nope. No way. How about you?
Me : Hell no.
Her : Yeah. I know.
Me : Although knowing this makes me feel a little better.
Her : Don’t worry. It’s fleeting. You’ll be miserable again in a minute.

Are there any blogs you enjoy reading?
Sure. My blogroll is filled with some of the funniest, wittiest folks around. Seriously, I am not one of those link-exchange kind of gals. If I don’t read someone regularly, they are not linked from me. Plus, some of my commenters are way funnier than I am. They make it worth the visit some days.

What’s the funniest entry on your blog?
S**t, I don’t know. That’s so subjective. I liked the series where I ran for Supreme Ruler around the time of the election this year ( That series of posts made me laugh. My readers? Who know what those crazy bastards think is funny.

What is your writing style?
Generally sucky.

Why should someone visit your site?
Because I am funny, brilliant, witty, gorgeous, and very, very humble.

What do people commonly say about your site?
That it doesn’t suck as bad as Avitable.
That and I am totally a waste of talent.

If you could recommend one website, what would it be and explain why.
Just one? What crap. That’s like one flavor of ice cream. One pizza topping. One kind of schnapp. Not happening. Now go over and read everyone on my blogroll twice.

Tell us just one of your favorite actors, actress's, film, song, and comedian
Actor-Kevin Spacey. The master of understatement.
Actress-Lucy Lui. I’d do her.
Film-Breakfast at Tiffany’s when I am feeling sappy…The Usual Suspects when I am not.
Song-I have such random taste in music. I am fickle. If you put my iPod, Aphrodite, on shuffle, you might hear “Fergalicious” followed by Old Blue Eyes. I plead the 5th.
Comedian-Lewis Black. He’s so pissed off I am envious. I am usually cranky, but rarely on that level. He gives me something to aspire to.

Tell us a joke.
Quit bossing me.

What would you wish for with 3 wishes?
A running column in the New Yorker.
A rent-controlled penthouse in Manhattan.
Oh yeah-and world peace or some s**t like that.

Your Site Address : Hot Coffee Girl