Sunday, January 14, 2007

101st Post! Still Funny?

J - Van Nuys Coin Laundry O E

Four Seasons Centre for the Performing Arts L O Gg S

So in the news, Soccer star David Beckham has signed for US Soccer club LA Galaxy. On a reported $1,000,000 a week deal. Not bad money if you can get it, which I can’t incidentally.

A new TV series is in development, in the style of the show, The West Wing. Titled ‘The Palace’ it will feature stories revolving around the British royal family. A much better concept would be to situate the royal family in Ceasers Palace, Las Vegas. The Queen on the slot machines, with her bucket of coins, Prince William getting hitched at a 24 hour Elvis wedding venue, and Prince Charles looking at the strip, and getting into drugs and debauchery like Nicolas Cage in Leaving Las Vegas. You could also have Prince Harry as a dirty cop, “You gotta ask yourself punk, how many bullets one has left, make ones day!”

Prince Harry’s Army regiment is set to be deployed in Iraq, that truly would be a battle royale.

Las Vegas tycoon, Steve Wynn, put his elbow through his multi million dollar Picasso painting, Le Reve(the dream). He certainly had a surreal moment.

Momofoku Ando who invented dried noodle snacks, has died aged 96. Like the added water, he lived life to the maximum level. Despite an unfortunate name, that often got him into hot water, it is estimated there were 250 billion servings of his noodles.

A British historian, Felipe Fernandez-Armesto, was arrested in Atlanta for crossing the road. Or to give it another name, jaywalking. He was put in handcuffs and surrounded by cops. Maybe he should have brushed up on his American history. No such law exists in the UK, we are trusted to cross the road when safe.

Random Quote #3
"Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television"
Victoria Wood
A Perfectly Good Random Quote Ruined By Analysis
Jogging is for people sensible enough, to not pay a gym fee to run on a running machine. When have you ever needed to be intelligent to watch TV. Tellytubbies, anyone? Jogging does seem to be a bit out of fashion, but if you have a personal trainer that is a different story. Someone to tell you when to run, jump, or skip, to keep you motivated. If I had Kelly Brook as my personal trainer it would certainly make me run faster.