Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Joe Blog's Interview #100 With Mr Angry

Name :
Mr. Angry
Age : Twenty-twelve
Location : Not London, but close enough.
Vocation : Space explorer. Or do you mean the one I ended up choosing?
Philosophy : Every single day someone, somewhere, does something stupid, and it is always funny. The more days when I am not that person, the better.

Sum up what your blog is about.
Well, it is a bit mixed. If I see or hear something that annoys me, I write about it, and use the cutting weapon of satire to show the people involved as the fools they are. I also try and make myself look cool to attract chicks and that.

Why are you doing your blog?
You mean other than to attract chicks? I did not even know what a blog was until December 2005 ("A diary on the Interweb? Are you mental?"), but my friends were always telling me I should 'write that down' when I would rant on in the pub about the day to day things that annoyed me. After just over a year of writing the blog, the things that would previously just make me angry now give me material and make me chuckle, which can only be a good thing I guess?

What's the funniest entry on your site?
That is difficult for me to say. This entry went into the Shaggy Blog Stories book for Comic Relief, but I am not sure my ritual humiliation is that funny. For some reason my stupid readers seem to prefer the posts where I am the butt of the joke, which is not the point at all (see previous point about attracting chicks etc). They do not seem to get the ones with insightful social commentary about the important issues of the day like Politics, Global Warming and Jade Goody.

What is your writing style?
I have absolutely no idea. I haven't done English since my GSCE's. I try and write the posts as if I was telling the story to someone in the pub, or emailing a friend. Ask others what my style is and they will probably say something like, 'juvenile'.

What do people commonly say about your site?
Fortunately people seem to like it. I put the nice things they say in the testimoanials. I am particularly proud of "Seems not bad".

What would you be doing if you weren't doing your blog?
I would probably have a proper hobby, and I'd still regaling people with my stories in the pub, but with slightly higher blood pressure.

Why should someone visit your site?
Because the other 100 million or so sites are rubbish. And generally speaking, if something has annoyed them, the chances are I've written about it at one point or another.

What did you learn from your first love?
How to say my sister is fourteen and likes to play table football at the weekend (in French, I was not in remedial classes or anything). She was ace. I looked her up on Friends Reunited recently, and she had become fat. She could have had me if she had stayed fit, which is a shame, for her.

Are there any blogs, you enjoy reading?
Lots of them. The ones listed on my sidebar are the ones I read regularly, most of which are funny, with some current affairs and personal ones thrown in as well. You have already interviewed a couple of my favourites in Richard Herring and JonnyB. Twenty Major is also very good indeed.

If you could invite anyone to a dinner party who would it be and why?
Elizabeth Shue (from 1988, you need a why?), my first love (also from 1988, or actually a little bit older than she was in 1988 - I am not a pervert - but she must still be fit), Stephen Hawking (I like the idea of asking him lots of question, but then unplugging him when he gets tiresome. I would also like to install one of those comedy satellite navigation voices on his computer. He would sound good as Ozzie Osbourne), Steve Merchant (underrated as a comedic writer, and with a funny accent to boot), and Gandhi (because he looked like he needed a good feed).

How do you chill out after a stressful day?
Chill out? What is that?What never fails to make you angry?People that fail to recognise their own stupidity, and continue to believe they are right, and behaving appropriately, even in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary.

Tell us about a good deed you have done recently.
This happened a couple of weeks ago. I think it counts as a 'good deed'. Sort of.

Tell us a random funny story that comes to mind.
Esther Rantzen once called me a f*cking imbecile under her breath, I think. Err, I guess you had to be there.

What advice would you have given yourself 5 years ago?
Remortgage the flat and put it all on Arsenal to win the FA Cup final 2-0 against Chelsea. And dump your girlfriend, she will cheat on you in 18 months if you don't. And don't go to Faliraki this summer, you will get the shits and it will be rubbish.

Any interesting travel stories?
I got arrested in Rome about ten years ago, it was a misunderstanding, of course, but I think that it is a distinct possibility that I am still a fugitive from the Law in that country. Which is a shame, what with me liking Pizzas and Spaghetti Bolognese.

What's the most incredible thing that ever happened to you?
I was on holiday in Dubai a few years ago and met Michael Vaughan in the hotel Reception area (he was/is England cricket Captain and was on his honeymoon), I was in the lift two minutes later with my then girlfriend waxing on about how much of a fan of his I was, and how he was one of my top three favourite sportspeople, along with Tiger Woods and Paul Gascoigne, when someone coughed behind me. It was Paul Gasgoigne. I looked skywards and corrected myself by saying, "My top four includes Anna Kournikova by the way". He was a very nice bloke actually, but much smaller than you'd imagine.

Now it's your turn! Ask me one question, anything you like.

I'm thinking of getting out of technology stocks and investing more in the emerging markets. Is this wise?

Joe Blogs : It's possibly the wisest thing I have heard today. Technology stocks are out, putting people in the stocks is in. Stocks and Cher's voice is in. Emerging markets are always good to invest in, just beware of boom and bust.

Check out Mr Angry's blog as you can see from this interview he is a funny guy.

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